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NFL Picks: Week 10, Weird Kids, Man Crush of the Week
By Dan | November 8, 2007
It’s the all important tenth week in the National Football League, and here’s the picks.
Pittsburgh over Cleveland. Pittsburgh looked like a beast against the Ravens, and I expect them to keep it groin.
Green Bay over Minnesota. One good running back doesn’t make a team, Packers will continue to play great ball.
Washington over Philadelphia. Philadelphia is looking down right GAWFUL lately. Skins take an easy one.
Tennessee over Jacksonville. Prediction of the CENTURY: Titans catch up with the Colts and win the AFC South.
Carolina over Atlanta. I think that Atlanta should cherish those 2 wins, because that’s all they’re getting.
KC over Denver. Denver looked embarrassing last week, and Priest Holmes is in comeback mode. I’m taking KC.
Buff N’ Blow over Miami. May be closer than most people think, but I’ll still take the Bills.
Saints over St.Louis. I’ll say it again and again, the Rams are the worst team in the NFL. They are set to go winless.
Baltimore over Cincinnati. Cincinnati is shaping up to be one of the biggest disappointments of 2007.
Chicago over Oakland. As much as I like Fargas and think he’ll have a good game, Josh McCown should not be in the NFL. If this guy’s your QB, you aint winning shit.
Seattle over San Fransisco. San Fran had a promising start, but they still need a lot of work.
UPSETS WHY NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Detroit over Arizona. Lions don’t travel well, but there is no denying they are red hot right now. Takin my Lions over Arizona.
New York Ass Suck over Dallas. New York is lookin to prove itself against the best team in the NFC, and they’re gonna get it done.
Whale’s Vagina over Indianapolis. Indy is gonna get smoked after a much needed spanking from the Pats.
I noticed that there’s been a sudden decline in weird kids coming into the school systems. And by weird I mean the pale kids with bug eyes that look like they could be taken down by a strong gust of wind. I’m hoping this is because Harry Potter-mania is at an end. I blame that book for transforming America’s children into geeks/dweebs/spazzes. Kids don’t need faggy fantasy lands, they need sports, preferably hockey or football, sports that can break bones and cause pain. Thanks to Harry Potter kids are sitting around reading, and becoming increasingly more irritating to their child care providers.
A few years back (when I was working as a substitute teacher) I had a kid ignore everything I said while holding up his pinky in the air. When I asked why he was ignoring me, he replied "I cast a spell on myself, if I hold my pinky up, I become invisible." I immediately sent him to the principal’s office for being weird. Later the principal told me that I wasn’t allowed to send kids to her on the basis of ‘being weird’. So I’m actually supposed to put up with that shit. I hope that kid is in High School wondering why his magic spells aren’t working on getting him a girlfriend.
I wish J.K Rowling would die. She’s still bugging me with Harry Potter crap even when I thought it was finished. She just decides to say Dumbledore is gay? What’s next? Harry Potter had a live sex act with a horse on broadway? Hermione’s a cunt? (I kind of suspected, she just seems ‘cunty’ to me)
It’s Ok to have a man-crush on…..
Kevin Garnett. The man’s a beast. 13 rebounds per game? Shit. Slap this man’s poster on your wall and kiss him goodnight before you go to bed. It’s officially not gay.
Off the Evite list FOR GOOD…
Don Shula. I wish I could see the look on his hall of fame face when I kick the hall of fame coach in the hall of fame balls. He’s so concerned about his undefeated record that he goes on record saying if the Pats go undefeated its tainted because of spygate. Does anyone think the Jets had a chance in that game? Show of hands, anyone? If you did, you’re a retard. Those video tapes were supposed to help the Pats in their next game against the Jets. Let’s see how they do.
How much did the Celtics score last night? 119? Pats will do better against the Jets. 120 points easy. Sit and watch it Shula, you piece of shit. Pats are an unstoppable juggernaut, Dolphins are and forever will be a bunch of fuckin faggy fish.
Yeah, I know they’re mammals.
What’s HOT right now…
Sam Adams Rivalry Ale. Best. Beer. EVAH! If you ever go to Foxwoods Casino, find the Stadium sports bar and get a pint of this. You almost don’t wanna piss it out, you want it to stay inside you forever.
What’s WICKED GAY right now…
Dog the Bounty Hunter. This man can never come back to his show ever. Not because of what he said, but because he cried and whimpered like a little bitch to Larry King AND Fox News. Would anyone like Boba Fett if he cried all the time. No. He picked up his father’s severed head and still decided to go into bounty hunting.
Wouldn’t it be an awesome movie if Boba Fett fought Predator? That woukd totally work too, because they’re both from outer space.
Boba vs. Predator? Not wicked gay at all.