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Corretion, Monster Trucks, Dick Farts, Moving, IHOP, Celtics, Bruins, and Wrestlemania
By Dan | March 8, 2008
I’m sowwy– I know that I wrote “mono” in my subject line last week and my blog entry had nothing to do with mono. The fact is I meant to write about mono, but forgot, so please stop bombarding me with emails.The good news is I don’t have mono. I called up my doctor last week asking to get tested, but he said it was unescessary. It turns out that a girl I had kissed on valentine’s day got mono that weekend, and suggested that there may have been a possibility I gave her mono. My doctor told me that even though I may be a carrier of the virus, I don’t have mono. Turns out carrying the virus shows no symptoms, but can make you a future mono factory where I can just keep spreading mono around or some shit like that. If I did give her mono than that may have to go down as one of the worst kisses of my life since I got nothing but teeth throughout it anyways. Very hard kissing a short girl when you’re as tall as I am. (Worst kiss on record is still in high school when I closed my eyes hoping to get my first kiss and ended up getting her nose)
More good news is that I am actually extremely excited to go to work every day now since I purchased Hot Wheels monster trucks for the first grade boys only to find out that they are the greatest toy ever made. I actually got in a heated debate with one 7 year old on how the Reptoid Truck does better flips than the Monster Mutt Truck.
Me: See, the Reptoid Truck is more aerodynamically engineered to do a flip due to the sweet kick-flip bar hot wheels installed on the rear bumper. It can do 360 flips 720 flips, and sometimes even a wheelie.
Kid: Monster Mutt is a truck that’s built like a dog, and it has dog ears! 
Me: Monster Mutt sucks, and your mother’s built like a dog, and your stupid face has dog ears!
Dan- 1
Stupid Kid- 0
Champzilla’s Blog presents “I was just thinking….” I was just thinking, what would it sound like if guy’s could fart out of their dick-holes? My theory is that if this is possible it would sound similar to the noise that a baloon makes when you slowly let the air out of it by pinching the end real tight. Ynow, that really high pitched “weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee” I helped someone move today, which means me and my friends did the ol’ drop-the-box-filled-with-broken-glass-un
Um, Yum. Went to IHOP today for the first time in forevah! Have to say, its still delicious, but why do they have to skimp me on the brakfast meats? 2 strips of bacon? N-word please. I love IHOP, but they have to find an equivalent to the Bickford’s 16 Wheeler, which is the undisputed king of all breakfasts.
What’s Wicked Hot Right Now- Alex Auld. Who thought after some great performances from Tim Thomas he was gonna start sucking so hard. Thank God for Alex Auld. Did you see that game against Washington? Neither did I, but I heard it was wicked good.
Man-Crush-Of-The-Week: Yes, once again, its Kevin Garnett. Thank you KG for blessing us with a Celtics playoff berth and Sam Cassell comic relief. Where am I gonna be for Celtics Playoff action? VEGAS BABY! Time to place bets on how much ass KG is gonna kick (My bet- a lot)
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